A Change of Perspective
by animeisalltome
Summary: Nagisa's mysterious aunt moves in with the Furukawa's. The gang rushes to put a on a play for Halloween. How will Nagisa and Tomoya's relationship progress? More of a romance than anything else. Please R&R!
1. A Change of Perspective

Disclaimer: I do not own~ Please review!

The days spent in the drama clubroom had been lacking activity. The preparations for the Cultural festival had sent everyone for a scrabble of time, spending every minute doing something. Our play had been a giant success when it had ran 3 months ago. Now, we sit in the clubroom, eating our bentos and chatting about the weather.

"I was surprised to see the clouds overhead this morning," Nagisa started as she tried to make small talk with the other members. No one responded and I was thankful for the silence, but also horrified that no one wanted to chat. That doesn't make any sense, but in these past few months, nothing I've done had been making sense. Kotomi nipped away hurriedly at her onigiri while Ryou and Kyou chatted about their upcoming weekend. Nagisa stayed silent and continued eating her lunch. I cleared my throat and she turned to me, her eyes widening.

"Tomoya-kun, maybe after school we can go on a date?" She said innocently enough, she cocked her head to the side and gave a shy grin. Kyou and Ryou stopped talking about whatever and looked at us. My face flamed up.

"Idiot!" I half whispered. "You don't ask like that!" I put my hand up to my head, and started shoveling food down, as not to respond. Nagisa continued on, unaware.

"But we are dating. We never do anything. We only ki-" I slapped my hand down on her mouth as Kyou broke up into fits of laughter. Kotomi only kept eating. Nagisa noticing her mistake widened her eyes of thought of telling everyone. Her eyes said 'I forgot there were other people in the room'. Damn, I thought.

"Ki- ki- kill spiders! We only kill spiders in my room," She hurriedly finished. I sighed at the jokes Kyou was going to make later on. Nagisa looked down and apologized to everyone her own face turning red. "…I just forgot you were here," she finished. I choked on my drink at how ridiculous that sounded. We returned to our equilibrium until the bell rang. I caught up to Nagisa in the hallway were she hurriedly apologized again. I just shook my head and patted her hair down. How couldn't I forgive someone so adorable? We returned home at normal time, having no need to stay over ten minutes in the drama clubroom. We were greeted by silence. The bakery was abandoned. I pictured the old man swinging the bat around at the park. Sanae must be teaching upstairs, I thought.

"We go on dates sometimes," I said, bringing up the embarrassing subject again. Nagisa's hair flittered in the breeze as she shut the door behind us. My heart started to pound. My face felt like it was on fire, starting from my neck, spreading to my ears. I was so lucky to be able to call her my… girlfriend. I didn't like that term, girlfriend. It sounded like I was some silly teenager in puppy love, which I was, but still. Nagisa was My Nagisa and that's all that mattered. She shook her head avidly.

"No, Tomoya-kun, we went on one date." She said as we took off our shoes and entered the house. I smelled Nagisa's scent throughout the house. It was a mixing between lavender and honey. All the Furukawa's had it, a slight smell clinging to their clothes. Whenever I got close to Nagisa, my nose was over powered by a strange longing, a smell that reminded me of home. I bet I smelt like this too, since moving into their house. My laundry was sun dried on a clothesline. I loved the Furukawa's residence. I was brought back to reality when Nagisa continued.

"I don't feel like we are a couple since we never do anything." Nagisa said staying in the same spot. I turned towards her and leaned down. I put my mouth next to her ear, not caring about how bold I was being.

"I love you, Nagisa. I will do anything for you. I would kill spiders with you all day long." I said. I felt foolish; we were only in high school, yet how could I be so certain about what I felt? It isn't that I am not sure of my feelings, rather, I feel so young. I hate the way adults pass our relationship off as a naiveté characteristic. Nagisa started giggling and I did too. We were doubled over in fits of laughter when Akio came in. He carried a baseball bat, as I suspected, a cigarette dangling out of his mouth.

"Kah! Punk. What's so funny? You look in a mirror?" Akio said in spite and then cracked up to his own jokes making our laughter prolonged. When we had eventually settled down, we went our separate ways. I did my homework on the table in the living room while Nagisa finished hers in her room, leaving me no chance to continue our conversation. Sanae and ten preschoolers left my room about an hour later. I finished the rest of my homework there until I was called for dinner. Dinner was amazing, side dishes courtesy of Nagisa. I loved Nagisa's cooking. No matter how good Sanae was I was always much more interested in whatever Nagisa had made. Akio was chuckling over a childhood story of Nagisa's, which I had learned to cancel out for the sake of Nagisa's and my embarrassment. Then suddenly the doorbell rang when after dinner tea was being served. I jumped causing the tea to spill of my pants. I groaned and reached for a napkin as the hot liquid soaked through my undergarment. Nagisa grabbed some napkins as well.

"I'll get it, Tomoya-kun" Nagisa said reaching for my pants, unaware of the awkward situation she was about to make. With out thinking another thought, Nagisa pressed on my family jewels with a napkin. Instantly she realized what she had done, she backed up with the soggy napkin in her palm. I threw my hands in the air to let Akio know I had no part in this. He just stared at his daughter, who's face was redder than a tomato. "I'm so sorry! I didn't mean- I mean I didn't think it was- I just-" She stammered on as the doorbell rang again. Everyone was frozen in his or her spots when Sanae got up and went to the door. I stood up, trying to ease the awkwardness of the moment. Nagisa had tears on her eyes, and I was wondering why she was so upset. All she did was… touch me in front of her parents. My face flamed up as well. I tried to resume my 'I don't care' attitude but was failing miserably. Akio was staring sternly at me. All at once, he cracked up into laughter. I was utterly confused and looked to Nagisa for support but she just shrugged her shoulder, she avoided looking me in the eye. Akio laughed and pointed. And then it hit me. The stain on my pants made it look like had wet myself.

"I can't believe my daughter's going out with a boy who wet his pants." Akio yelled. I laughed also, a strained laugh. This is when Sanae walked back in. She smiled at her family, and the weird scene it probably looked like, and took a step to the side and revealed the most beautiful person I ever saw.


	2. Chapter 2

Of course, so be it, the most beautiful person I had ever seen turned out to be 18 month old. This little girl held in her mother's arms had shoulder length blonde hair. Imagine my surprise when I realized she was 100% Japanese. I shook my head at the thought of this beautiful baby coming from what seemed to be her mother. Her mother stood awkwardly in the doorway. The woman seemed to be in her early thirties, worry lines streaked her forehead that led me to believing that she was much older. The mother had short-cropped black hair and eyes blacker than I had ever seen them before. My ideal woman was Nagisa, so I couldn't criticize this woman without criticizing my beloved. Their nose was the same, the mouth in the same place. How did the proportions fit Nagisa's face so beautifully while the woman in the doorway's appearance didn't match? The woman's body was big and tall, not fat though. Her lean athleticism could be seen through her skintight pants. We remained silent for a few minutes while Akio sat back in his seat, grouchily. I looked over to Nagisa to see if she knew whom this person was but she shrugged her shoulders.

"This is my sister, Hisako." Sanae announced. "This is my daughter, Nagisa and her friend, Tomoya." She said pointing us out. Was it strange that Nagisa didn't know her own aunt? I didn't have any aunts of uncles, it was a pretty pathetic family tree I had… have. "Although I don't know if they are only friends." Sanae whispered loudly to her sister. They burst out in an almost rhythmic pattern of laughs. I suddenly found the carpet very interesting. When I looked up I saw that Nagisa was staring at the floor as well. I was expecting Akio to gasp at any minute and scream "WHY AREN'T YOU DENYING IT?" to his precious daughter but he kept his mouth shut. "This little baby is Kimi." Sanae said taking the baby from her sister and swinging the baby around. I was getting sick just from watching this twirling motion, but the baby seemed to enjoy it.

"I think it'd best if the two of you go to your rooms." Akio grumbled. Nagisa and I looked at each other, and walked up the stairs slowly. Surely there wasn't anything wrong, right? Nagisa and I both went to my room.

"Have you met her before?" I asked her, sitting down on the floor in my room. The light was slowly disappearing from the room as I watched the sun set through the window. Nagisa kneeled as she answered.

"No, I didn't even know my mom had any siblings. I feel that the world has gotten a lot larger suddenly." I could hear the strained voices from downstairs and hoped an argument wouldn't arise. I tried to keep the conversation flowing as not to seem like I was eavesdropping.

"That baby was cute, huh? How unusual, the color of her hair that is." I shifted so I was on my back now staring at the ceiling. Nagisa did the same and slipped her hand into mine.

"Yes, and I know that Grandmother has had dark hair her whole life. Must be from Hisako's husband, Kimi's father." Nagisa said. I squeezed her hand and said nothing. "I'd always wanted siblings. I thought it would be grand to have someone to talk to and someone to look up to me." I nodded. I had never wondered what it would have been like if I had siblings. When my mom died, the thought of a child having to suffer the same things as me made me cringe. My father would just ignore my brother or sister as he did to me.

"It's strange how only children want brothers and sisters while a person with a full family longs to be alone," I said. The ceiling was very plain, no watermarks or dots to count. I turned my head towards Nagisa; she on the other hand, had no trouble staring at the whiteness above her. We stayed like this for a few more minutes. Downstairs was quiet as well.

"We could do something this Sunday, I guess. I mean if you would want to." I started talking to the left side of Nagisa's face. Her head snapped in my direction, and I was so surprised I jumped. The thought of Nagisa doing anything so fast and with so much energy scared me. She would grow out of having me around with that much determination. She stared at me for a few seconds to see if I was joking.

"T-Tomoya? Like a date?" She blushed. I nodded although unsure about what we could do. I had no extra money. I didn't know what you were supposed to do. Nagisa was my first girlfriend. Even in grade school where you have a "lover" for a day and you chase them around the playground making kissy faces eluded me. We had been on one date before successful only because of Mei, Sunohara's little sister.

"Of- Of course!" Nagisa said. I sighed, it was so cute how she stammered each word, but could she stop giving me time to worry? Her auburn hair had grown over the summer and now fell past her shoulders. My gaze was set on her face; staring at her beauty made any other's a caricature. I heard steps coming on the stairs and quickly shifted to sitting position, snapping my hand out of Nagisa's. Although we had been dating for several months, I hadn't made an official announcement to her parents. There was no doubt they knew what was going on but I decided not to chance it. Sanae opened the door with her usual smile. I was glad that whatever had happened downstairs was resolved.

"We need to talk to you too, downstairs, please. Now." Sanae said, and it was only then did I notice that the smile was forced, the strain showing in her eyes. I tried to keep my eyes away from the sorry sight as I headed downstairs with the two girls following closely behind me. Akio and Hisako sat at the table not even acknowledging each other's existence. Baby Kimi was happily trying to crawl throughout the room. I sat down at the edge of the table while Nagisa and Sanae gathered to the side of me.

"Hisako will be staying with us for a while. She will help out in the bakery for a while and then she will leave. Nagisa, get out the other futon in you room." Akio said. Nagisa nodded and then smiled at Hisako. Hisako was obviously surprised by this act of kindness and smiled back dazedly.

"I have a crib. It's in the car." Hisako said. Her speech was detached, coarse as if she'd been screaming. Nagisa and I blanched at the thought of someone owning a car. If she was so rich as to own a car, how come she needed to stay at the Furukawa's place? Nagisa and I followed this woman towards the front. I saw a black sedan parked in front of the Furukawa's place and knew she would have to move it later. We had to walk around the car to reach the entrance of our bakery… their bakery. Hisako was surprisingly taller than me. I got the crib from the back, to my astonishment it was already set up. I saw only one other box in the trunk and wondered how long Hisako was planning on staying for. I was silent throughout but Nagisa talked to her long lost aunt the whole time.

"So she is a year and a half? So cute!" Nagisa kept going asking Hisako many of, what seemed to me as, unimportant questions.

"How long are you staying?" I asked quickly when Nagisa took a breath. I couldn't help but notice how different Nagisa had become over the past year. Someone who was always curious now replaced her usual unresponsive shy personality.

"Only a month or two..." As Hisako drifted off, I realized that she had no clue how long she intended on staying.

"If you don't mind me asking," I stopped mid-sentence to think about what I want to say. I could only ask one rude question a night right? I settled for the seemingly less offense one. "Why do I get the feeling Akio is mad at you?" Hisako, who had already found herself comfortable with us, responded nonchalantly.

"I opposed their wedding is all." She took her box up the steps into Nagisa's room with out so much as a glance back. I decided not to pry although my mind was going crazy with questions. I gaped at Nagisa and she motioned for me to be silent as Akio walked up.

"Kah! Punk who do you think you are talking with my daughter? She wouldn't want to talk to such a loser." His delivery was all wrong and even his insult had little effect. Nagisa shook her head.

"Yes, I would." With those three words she went up stairs, leaving just Akio, the crib and I. Of course if you were me who experienced verbal abuse on a daily basis, you would be surprised to know that Akio just walked away. I found myself staring at the place he had left.

"Hisako, where have you been all my life?" I muttered to myself and started the difficult task of getting the crib up the stairs.

If the crib had remained in the box, I would have been able to easily carry it across the stairs and into their room with out so much as a complain, but since the crib was already set up it was impossible. The crib itself could have been no more than three feet wide. The sheets already neatly made on the little mattress inside. Instead of one of the newer modern cribs, Hisako had brought an old fashioned wooden crib, with rigid pools. I weighed more than I thought it would. I finally figured a suitable to get up the stairs after ten minutes. I had to first take the bottom edge of the crib up and move it over three steps, then go down the cramped space on the other side and repeat on the other side. Unexciting as this seems it took me over half an hour to successfully put the crib in Nagisa's room. I looked at the clock and realized it was already 8. I whispered good night to Nagisa, breathing it into her ear as Hisako was looking away. Nagisa blushed and giggled as I quickly kissed her cheek and flew out of the room. I closed the door gently behind me. When would my heart ever stop racing when I was near her? I hopped into my own futon and pulled the covers on top of me. The darkness mildly scared me as it did when nighttime fell. My fear off the darkness was not one of the boogieman but instead of not being able to see. Vulnerability was my enemy, while predictability was my solace. I fell asleep soon after as the waves of drowsiness lulled me to sleep. Life was always most serene in the seconds before you fell asleep. You never remember what you thought about in the morning, only that you were out in the next minute and hoping it was pleasant enough. That is what I felt now, thinking of Nagisa's face and her body in my arms.


	3. Chapter 3

I woke up as the alarm clock rang and was glad that today was finally Friday. This long week was somehow longer than the others, days in the drama club passed in agony. I wondered why the club was in session if we were only going to do one activity a year. I opened the door of my bedroom; I had gotten up 15 minutes early than I would have any other day. I knew that with 3 and a half people sharing the upstairs bathroom things would get crowded. I took a quick shower, washing my hair with Nagisa's shampoo. I loved how it smelled, like the familiar lavender. I don't even remember what I used to wash my hair before I moved to the Furukawa's. I dressed quickly and tried to towel dry my hair. I walked out of the bathroom and bumped into Nagisa. She swayed lightly and then fell on to my chest. Nagisa was the cutest in pajamas to me, her hair sticking every which way. She didn't move out of the way, just kept her face pressed against my shirt. I could tell how embarrassed she was, her face was hot through my shirt. I wonder if she was so embarrassed why not pull away. Gosh, I loved her. I took her head in my hands and pulled her head away from my chest, I looked into her eyes. They were swollen and immediately I frowned.

"Did you not get enough sleep?" I asked, concerned. She nodded her head slowly.

"The baby cries at night. I'm surprised she didn't wake you through the walls." Nagisa said. I was in a deep sleep last night, no dreams to remember. I just patted her head. I leaned down and smelled her hair. I placed my head on top of hers. I wrapped her in a huge hug. We stayed like this for a few minutes, neither of us daring to break away. Her body fit neatly into my own, taking forms where it needed to. I wasn't religious but I knew God had decided that we should be together. "I can't wait until Sunday. I love you." Nagisa said. I had no response to this; we both knew my answer.

"Uh am I interrupting?" Hisako said. I jumped about a mile and half. I then realized how cliché the situation was. I couldn't believe I hadn't seen this coming, of course the house guest would find us in a compromising situation. Nagisa's blush had turned violet, and I admit that I felt my face flame too, as uncommon as it happened. Hisako broke into a grin, she giggled and walked away knowing she had a piece of evidence to frame us with for the rest of our life. I quickly followed Hisako down the stairs; Kimi stared back over her mother's shoulder almost mockingly.

"Hisako." I called out. She turned around with the same grin plastered on her face.

"Yes?" She said sarcastically. I shook my head, I didn't realize Sanae had comic for a sibling.

"Just… Could you please not tell Akio and Sanae yet? I will tell them soon, I just… You… We- we won't be the same when I tell them. I want them to trust me with her, d'you know?" I stammered, Hisako's knowing gaze stared into my eyes and I had to look away.

"Whatever. Wouldn't they trust you better if they knew that you had been sneaking around behind their backs?" Hisako said and started the tea, not giving me a chance to answer. Then suddenly everything made sense, three months ago when the thought of sneaking around was so intoxicating now seemed silly. If I loved Nagisa so much, I wanted to tell the whole world.

I walked to school in daze, and remained in the clouds until after the last bell had rung. Sunohara and I made our way down to the Drama Club room, he was babbling on about an anime that was on television the night before. Why was it that two years ago I thought every conversation we had was a contribution to mankind, when now it seemed so insignificant? We opened the door to the familiar classroom and as usual we were the last people to get there.

"Where the hell have you been?" Kyou yelled throwing a book at Sunohara and ignoring me completely. He flew out of the clubroom. I walked into the room unscathed.

"Yo," I said to the others in the club. They nodded back, while Nagisa was working on something distractedly in the corner. "What are you working on?" I asked her as I took the chair opposite of her. I saw Kyou roll her eyes.

"We've been asking her the same thing for the past five minutes while you two idiots have been slacking off." Kyou said. Ryou just shook her head at her sister while continuing with her tarot cards. Kotomi was fully engrossed in a library book. I looked to the cardboard paper filled in with Dango Daikazoku. I laughed. Nagisa stood up with force and mirrored the image to the room. It read, "Please visit the Drama Club for Halloween day parade." I was so proud Nagisa had planned something I felt like yelling, "That's my baby," but with my mouth poised open I decided against it.

"You may or may not know about the Halloween day parade this year. Halloween is conveniently on a Saturday, so the school had decided for a small festival. As the drama club president and founder, I think we should put on a play matching the theme. If it is all right I have chosen… Sleeping Beauty." She let out a huge breath of air. The determination in her eyes mixed with the strange play made the room burst out into showers of laughter. I admit to a chuckle myself, as Nagisa didn't get the joke. "What?" She said her voice cracking, "What's so funny?" Sunohara pounded the desk with his fist and laughed harder.

"Sleeping beauty? That doesn't have anything to do with Halloween! That's not scary at all!" Kyou said holding her side. The laughter quickly died down and Nagisa's cheeks flamed with anger. She said nothing although was plainly furious with us laughing at her choice. She slumped down in her chair. I patted her back knowing this would blow over in a few minutes. Kyou felt guilty about laughing so hard and quickly apologized to her.

"I was just thinking of more of a horror story, is all." Kyou said. Ryou nodded, Kotomi had stayed silent all the while. She spoke up now, her blank expression had become an almost a given in every conversation.

"I think I get it. Fairies, kings and queens are all in Sleeping Beauty. It is a fantasy. I think it's a great idea." Kotomi said and I was grateful. She always knew exactly what to say. Nagisa nodded. We decided what jobs, in this case roles, we would get. Nagisa obviously would get sleeping beauty. I was the Prince, decided after my many objections. Ryou and Kotomi were the fairies while Kyou begrudgingly took the role of the witch. Sunohara and Mei would run lights. Sunohara swore he would get Mei to come, but I wondered where she would stay. The Furukawa's was full for the moment. With Hisako and all. I still felt mildly embarrassed about what happened in the morning. And then just like that, it hit me. I would have to tell Akio and Sanae about Nagisa and I when we got home. It was either this or Hisako telling them herself. My brain and heart both stopped at the same time. How would I even begun to say something like that? Do I just dive in or beat around the bush until they take the hint? Just thinking about it made my head spin. And to have Hisako listening in, that will judge me. She already thought I was a bad influence. How could I make them see that I was serious? The meeting ended soon after Nagisa passed out the scripts. The sun was setting as we walked home. I so wanted to hold her hand, for these last secret moments. We walked silently and slowly. I took my hand out of my pocket and slipped it into hers. She nodded and smiled approvingly. I took it she was thinking the same thing as me. I felt I needed to tell her. On second thought, what good would it do her to stress over it. I would tell them after dinner just her parents and me. Her hands clung to mine. The days in her summer uniform were numbered. I could already feel the temperature changing. Autumn was my favorite season, the leaves changing colors was so scenic. When we reached the road where my old house laid, I couldn't help but wonder how my dad was doing. As much I as I hated him, I hoped he was all right. Thank you, Nagisa, for saving me. For saving me from that house, for saving me from that life. I squeezed her hand tighter. She smiled that smile that she always had when I was near. I loved her so much; I felt my heartstrings twang when I looked into her eyes. I felt like a harp inside of my chest, playing a soft medley of my most intimate feelings. How I wish she were only mine. Jealously raged over me as the thought of other men looking at her. I was crazy. It was too much. I was dizzy. We reached the front door. I went to the kitchen immediately and sat down, trying to calm down the headache I felt coming on. I put my head on the cool wood and lay with my eyes closed for a few seconds. Just when I had started feeling better, Akio comes in, of course.

"Kid! Get up! Good for nothing! Do your homework or something. Stop freeloading." Akio said. His usual tough guy façade was up again. Sometimes I started to doubt my constant reassurance to myself that it was just a mask. I picked my head grudgingly of the hard table and picked up my bag. I started working on the math worksheet. Math was always the worst for me. I quickly realized _I_ was doing _my homework_. I realized how whipped I was and crumpled the paper into a ball and shot it into the wastebasket.

"Nice shot," Hisako said coming up behind me. I jumped when I heard her voice. "You're not in basketball?" She continued. I shook my head. I wondered how Hisako looked when she was younger. I pictured as a student frantically studying for a test. "Oh good, then get your homework out of the trashcan. Don't think you can pull that on me." She left the room without another word. I was still wondering what personality Hisako had. The only word that came to mind was 'smart-ass'. I couldn't believe she was Sanae's sister, Akio's sister made more sense. Sanae walked in with tea, and suddenly I realized that I didn't know where Nagisa had gone. I looked around. I stood up quickly, and then sat down just as fast. I don't want to be that boyfriend, the one who needs to know where she is all the time. Sanae laughed and I looked up.

"You are funny to watch, Tomoya." She said. She poured me a glass of tea, I gratefully accepted.

"Um, Sanae, what did you do when you wanted to tell your parents about you and Akio?" I asked. The blush crept up my neck again. I cursed myself for not being able to control it.

"Well, I didn't." She said simply. And how was I supposed to react to that. I remembered what Hisako had said yesterday night about opposing to their wedding and imagined some kind of intricate soap opera spreading out. Sanae saw my questioning gaze. "They already knew. We weren't that secret about it. Then I got pregnant with Nagisa and I guess they knew." She chuckled. I laughed along politely, I felt the awkward tension building up but Sanae seemed oblivious to it. I excused myself and took my homework upstairs. It was much more difficult than I thought and it took me until 5. I suddenly felt like Glinda the Good Witch, I was doing my homework and I was going to school on a regular basis. I missed my old delinquent ways, where was my macho air? There was nothing mysterious about being a prep. I sighed again. The Furukawa's ate dinner late by my standards. 7 was usually when Akio turned on the grill and dinner was usually served around 8. I made sure each day to each bigger portions of lunch or else I'm sure I would starve. Since I had 3 hours or so left. I decided to write out what I was going to say. After about an hour I had gotten as far as 'Akio, Sanae, I have something to say' when I heard a knock on my door. I yelled that it was open. The door slowly cracked open, and unsteadily walked Kimi; she stumbled over to the desk where I was sitting. She grabbed on to my knee. I was about to question how she turned the knob on my door when Nagisa appeared and closed the door behind her. I picked up the child and held her on my lap. I might not look it, but I loved babies. There round cheeks and innocence in their eyes drew me in… like someone else I know. Nagisa came over to me.

"You seem pretty comfortable." She said giggling. I bounced Kimi up and down on my knee; her hand was clasped around my index finger.

"What can I say? The babies love me." I answered sarcastically as Nagisa and I laughed. "You want to get on next?" I asked as I set Kimi on the ground and held out my knee to Nagisa. She blushed.

"Tomoya!" She yelled. I was flattered when I realized she had been thinking about it too.

"Are you getting jealous of a baby?" I asked smiling. It was nice to know I wasn't the only one.

"N-No" She protested and I knew she was lying. I laughed and pulled her down onto my lap. She was caught off guard but eventually settled down. I could see her blush from the back of her neck. I grabbed her in a hug. She leaned back onto my chest as I wrapped my arms around her waist. We watched as Kimi struggled to get up from a sitting to standing position.

"D'you ever think about marriage and family?" I breathed into the crook in between her neck and shoulder. She shivered. I was surprised by this reaction. I pulled her tighter in the hug.

"Of course. What girl doesn't dream about her happily ever after?" She asked as if it were unfathomable to be alone. I shrugged.

"What about you?" She said. She stood up when she said this and left my arms dangling in mid air.

"I asked you the question didn't I? Yeah, I guess I do sometimes." I said. _…With you_ I almost added, but stopped myself in the nick of time. She nodded.

"I came up to tell you that dinner was almost ready. But you distracted me." She said. She gathered the baby into her arms.

"I distracted you with my dashing good looks, didn't I?" I joked. She rolled her eyes and opened the door to my room.

"Just come downstairs, alright?" She said. I could see her shaking her head as she walked down the steps. I looked back at the unfinished speech on my desk, crumpled it up and hoped my impromptu skills would work. I gathered my courage and walked down the steps knowing fully well what I was doing.


	4. Chapter 4

Dinner was silent and awkward. I contributed to the silence by adding nothing. Sanae and Hisako chatted politely, while Akio just stared at his plate. I felt something was wrong with Nagisa's father and being the saint I was asked him politely what the matter was.

"Hey Old Man, what the hell is the matter with you?" I said from across the table. I suddenly had the thought that maybe Hisako had already told him about Nagisa and me. My gaze darted to her, but she was engrossed in a talk about gardens with Sanae.

"Is that the way you should treat the man letting you sleep in his house? It's nothing. Girl troubles, something you wouldn't know about." Akio said.

"Actually I do know. Your daughter and I are dating." Is what I would have liked to say but all that came up was 'pass the soy sauce'. Even worse was that my voice cracked on the last word. "Can I talk to you after dinner, Akio?" I asked thinking that if it were the two of us, there would be pressure off. I then realized if we were alone he could easily kill me without witnesses.

"I already told you, kid. Your voice is cracking because of puberty." He obviously was waiting for a time to use that joke. I sighed instead of having a comeback.

"No, it's- it's serious." I said. I stared down at my plate. I heard Nagisa's chopsticks clatter on her plate. I looked at her, and her eyes said that she knew what I wanted to talk to him about. I just shrugged my shoulders lightly and went back to staring into space. I would start a train of thought for the beginning of what I wanted to tell Akio but the words would fade out quickly and I would just start staring again. I ate slowly not wanting rush anything. Kimi was fed cheerio's which after listening to a conversation between the sisters I realized was the only liked. I dreaded what was coming up next. I felt like I was on a roller coaster. You wait an hour in line, getting excited; you get strapped into the seat, ready to go. Then you go up, up, up and just before you reach the very top, you start getting nervous, you see the slope spreading out in front of you. You want to get off of it, but you can't. By the time your brain has processed that this is a bad idea you are flung down. And while thinking of this metaphor I got up from my place at the table and found Akio in the back, smoking a cigarette.

"Akio," I started unaware of what to do next. He was staring into space like I was just seconds earlier.

"I know what you want to tell me." Akio said, and I was surprised by the serious tone he took.

"You do?" I asked in surprise. So Hisako did tell him. I sighed.

"I thought it was time that you had moved back in with your dad. I'm glad you mentioned it first. It's good you noticed that it was getting crowded and we don't know exactly how long Hisako is staying-" He continued on but I tuned him out. So he didn't know. Great, I thought, now I had to correct him. I put my hand up to stop him. He did cease his talking and stared at the hand in confusion. I heard some neighborhood kids screaming in the wake of this silence

"That- well that isn't what I wanted to talk about. I have no intention of moving back with my father, despite what you think. I came to tell you… well I came to say that…" I started, my whole body was flaming. I hoped that I wasn't going to make a fool of myself. Akio kept his gaze on me, showing no signs of recognition. "I know that we are only in high school but I… I am in love with your daughter." I intended this to be very proud and intended to stare Akio down but instead, when I looked to Akio I got scared and instead talked to his chin hoping her wouldn't notice. I didn't dare look to see what his eyes were saying.

"Ha! That's funny." Akio said suddenly and I looked up to his whole face. He was laughing as if I had told the funniest line in the world. I was confused until I realized he hadn't taken me seriously at all.

"I'm serious. I love Nagisa!" I protested. I sounded like a 5 year old begging for a piece of candy. The mood was ruined.

"No you don't." Akio said simply. He smashed his cigarette in the ashtray beside him.

"Yes I do!" I said. Why didn't he take me seriously?

"No you don't." He retorted and slid open the door. Akio took a step inside but I grabbed him by his shirt collar and pulled him back towards me. This was the first time I had touched Akio. I felt awkward and surprised by my actions and immediately let go. He shrugged my hand off, hitting it as it dropped to my side. He gave me a look that I will never forget, one mixed hurt and hatred. The defensiveness in his eyes scared me, I was not used to Akio having his heart on his sleeve like that. "No you don't." He said again. He took a step into the house, his house, again. I followed him in.

"Yes I do! Nagisa and I have been dating." I yelled as he walked quickly into the kitchen trying escape me. The girls were in the kitchen cleaning off the dishes. They stopped talking the second they saw us. They had obviously heard what I said. Nagisa's eyes were opened wide. She blushed and smiled.

"No you aren't!" Akio yelled scaring the crap out of me. His hands were clasped over ears. Now he looked like the five year old.

"Dad!" Nagisa yelled. She realized that he was not getting it either. "It's true! You need to listen. I can't be your little girl forever!" She screamed the last part, so high it was barley audible. The room was still and I felt like an outsider looking in on a family drama. I wanted to escape but it was too late. The roller coaster had already begun descending. Akio slowly lowered his hands. Sanae walked over to her husband and put her hands on his shoulders. What could I say to fill the silence?

"I just love her." I said hoping I didn't make things any more awkward. He nodded slowly.

"I'll kill you tonight in your sleep. Just you wait. I'll kill you if you ever even touch a hair on her." Akio said. Hisako started laughing uncontrollably, ruining the moment.

"Get your own line! He stole that from me." She told Nagisa and me. I nodded, not understanding. "I said that to him when he wanted to runaway. I said that exact same thing! I should be a writer or something." We all laughed. Did that mean Akio accepted us?

"So…." I started but was interrupted.

"You see, the thing is Hisako, you wouldn't have killed me, while I, on the hand, am being completely serious." Akio said with a straight face but his guise was ruined when he broke into a smile. He stuck out his hand to me and I shook it graciously.

"I won't ever make her cry, you'll see." I said. I wanted to continue our conversation to gain more of his trust but he yawned a huge fake yawn and claimed he was tired and went to bed. I knew I screwed it up. I always do. Everyone went to bed soon after. I was in the bathroom brushing my teeth when Nagisa came in. She knocked on the door, which really had no point since she was already inside the cramped bathroom. I spit and looked at her, leaning my hands on the sink.

"I'm sorry I made your dad mad." I said. All she did was nod. She walked over to me and took my hand lightly in her own.

"I'm really happy you did that. I'm so glad." She said, tears gathered in her eyes. I patted her back. "My dad probably hates us now though." She smiled and brushed the tears away.

"He doesn't hate us. I'm sure he understands." I hope, I thought to myself. We parted soon after scared of being caught by Hisako again.

"I hope you sleep better tonight." I whispered as we parted. In bed that night, I tried to keep my eyes open for fear of being murdered, but eventually sleep consumed me.

I woke and looked at the clock. It was 3. I rubbed my eyes and went to the bathroom. When I had relieved myself, I realized I would never be able to get back to sleep. I walked downstairs quietly to find the living room light on. I peeked in and found Hisako giving Kimi a bottle. I walked in and sat down next to her.

"You have to do this every night?" I asked her. She shook her head.

"She's been restless lately is all," Hisako responded, she did not look tired at all. "She is really good. I'm surprised how easy she is to handle. I guess I'm just lucky."

"Hmm" I said and began to feel my eyes close, I forced them open again.

"You are just like Akio, what you did tonight anyway." She said. I looked to her and placed my head on the table. Oh great, I felt a story coming on. "When we found out about Sanae being pregnant with Nagisa we all knew it was Akio. Although they hadn't announced they were serious, they were always together. The summer after their senior year was when they told us. He just walked into the living room one day and flat out said

'Sorry, but I love your daughter. We are getting married today.' And then walked out. Of course I'm assuming that Nagisa isn't pregnant." She said. I picked my head off the table quickly.

"No, I mean, we haven't even… you know." I trailed off as Hisako stared at me.

"I was so sure that Kimi's father loved me. You make sure that she knows, every day." Hisako said, she staring off into her own little world. I felt bad that her life was so messed up. She came back to reality.

"You should get some sleep. Go back to bed." She said. It wasn't as much of a request as saying 'get out'. I nodded and went back to bed. And to my utter surprise I feel asleep.

When I woke up I realized it was the 1rst day of October. We had exactly 31 days to learn our lines and perform a perfect play. I crammed my lines knowing that today would be an easy day. The prince had a pretty significant part but despite it not many lines and I thanked Nagisa. The version we had was a straight play, no singing. I had only to meet the princess and exchange a few words and battle the dragon and kiss the princess awake that I'm sure would be awkward for more than just Nagisa and me. I walked down stairs, taking two by two. I saw Hisako and Nagisa in the living room. Nagisa had Kimi cradled in her arms and was holding the bottle to the baby's lips. I felt my heart skip a beat and wondered if she would someday for our kids- WAIT! Push the brakes, was I really thinking about that much commitment. I shuddered and sat down next to Nagisa.

"Where are Sanae and the Old Man?" I asked. The house was unusually quiet and I wondered where the two owners would be on the bakery's only day off.

"Dad has a baseball game and Mom went to cheer him on." Nagisa said. The bottle was drained and she shifted the baby into a sitting position and let her roam.

"Why didn't you go?" I asked. Hisako sat in front of me with her head on her knuckles. Nagisa's face turned red.

"Well, I wanted to see you wake up." She whispered and I blushed as well. How could she say that in front of her aunt? Change the subject, Change the subject.

"Uh so uh Hisako. I was wondering what the age difference between you and Sanae is." I said. I thought this was a very smooth transition and felt proud of my self.

"We are 3 years apart. She's older than me." She said, she chuckled and I knew that she knew I didn't really need an answer.

"What about you, Tomoya? Any siblings to fight with?" She asked. I shook my head. "Oh so why are you taking up space in my sister's house?" I thought about a good way to answer this without seeming ungrateful, I didn't have to think long about it when Nagisa answered for me.

"I invited him to live with us, he wasn't getting along with his father." She said nonchalantly. I mouthed 'thank you' to her behind a hand. She smiled.

"I just got an idea. We are going somewhere right now. Come with me." Hisako got up from the table and walked out the front. Nagisa and I looked at each other and followed her out. What else were supposed to do? Expecting a big trip or something even mildly exciting, imagine our surprise when Hisako walked us to the nearest convient store and bought us ice cream. We thanked her unsure of what else to do. Maybe she just didn't know what to do with teenagers. We sat on a bench and finished our ice cream while Hisako looked upon us.

"I think that Akio hates me." Hisako stated out of the blue. I dropped my Captain America. Nagisa froze.

"What?" I said. I then realized the ice cream run was just an excuse to spill her problems on us. Of course.

"When I was a second year in middle school I was going out with an older boyfriend. His name was Akio. I treated him like crap. I don't know how he put up with me. I guess I'm just too independent to stay in relationships for a long time. I cheated on him and dumped him. He came by to give me back the presents I got for him and he met Sanae. I felt bad about two weeks later and decided to take him back but then my sister got involved with him. And that is why he hates me. I would feel the same way too, especially sense I am staying in his home. No wonder." She said. Ah, now everything made sense. She must not have any friends. "I'm sorry to dump all of this on you but I don't really have any friends." DING DING DING! We have a winner! I thought this but then immediately felt bad. When I looked at Hisako, I saw a young woman who was so insecure she didn't know how to act.

"Um," Nagisa started. "We like you Hisako. Right, Tomoya?" I nodded my head.

"Listen, Hisako, he doesn't like anyone. Don't be offended." I said jokingly.

"No, he likes you Tomoya. I know he does. He told me so." She said. I wondered when my name was brought up during their conversation. We headed back to the house. Hisako apologized again and I went to my room and stayed there all day, not even venturing out for food. What had I gotten myself into?


	5. Chapter 5

The next morning was Sunday and woke up with a pain in my stomach. Hunger complains came from within me. I groaned and went down to the kitchen and made myself a bowl of cereal. Who's bright idea was it to sulk in my room and not eat? I cursed myself for my stupidity. I ravished the bowl I had made and then the next. Nagisa came in some seconds later already dressed. Her hair was curled and I noticed the neatly applied lipstick. She looked so much older. More like a teenager now.

"Where are you going looking so pretty?" I asked. Nagisa's face turned red and she looked away. And then I realized that I had promised her a date. I played it off as if I had known all along. "… Other than with me…" I finished lamely.

"We don't have to go if you don't want to." She said. I shook my head. I had screwed it up yet again.

"No! No. We should go. I just don't know how we are going to sneak out of the house without being questioned by your parents." I thought about how Akio had been ignoring me for the past two days and wondered if he was still mad.

"Speak of the Devil." I said as Akio walked up beside us. He grabbed me by the shirt collar.

"Kah, Kid. What the Hell are you talking about? Don't make me beat you up. Humph, first you steal my daughter and now this." Akio said shaking his fists in the air. What a drama queen. I take it he was still mad at me.

"Hey, listen Akio. Nagisa and I are going on a love love super romantic date, all right? So don't wait up." I said teasing him. Nagisa stomped her foot.

"Tomoya!" She said obviously annoyed. I loved how her cheeks puffed out when she was mad. Why did she have to be so darn adorable?

"Ha! Fine! Go on your date but then I guess you won't be getting the cake Sanae made especially for me." Akio said, obviously thinking we were joking. What a lame threat, even if it was a joke. Was he really comparing his daughter to a cake? I turned away and winked at Nagisa.

"Yay! Nagisa did you hear that? We get to leave. Bye Akio! See you!" I grabbed her hand and headed out the door.

"Hey! Wait! Punk!" Akio screamed after us. I had sprinted around the corner when I felt Nagisa getting behind. I stopped and breathed for a few seconds.

"T- Tomoya? Can we really do that?" Nagisa asked and then gasped for breath. I nodded.

"What is he going to do? I mean we are… dating." I said, looking at the ground. A date required doing things right? Where would we go? I had only a few dollars in my pocket. What could we do for free?

"Do you want to go to the park?" I asked. She nodded and we headed off. Not many people visited this specific location; there were only a few swings and the pea gravel made clothing white. A slide stood in the center. We went over to the swings. I took the one closest to the bars while Nagisa sat beside me.

"I feel like we are never alone together, but if I look back, you are always near me." Nagisa started, skipping the awkward small talk all together. I stayed silent and started to swing my body back and forth. Nagisa stayed still. "I love this town, and this school, but I wish it were over already. I want to be in charge." I thought this sounded silly coming from Nagisa, one of the most submissive people I know.

"I know what you mean. I hate living at your place and burdening your family but I can't do anything about it. I can't wait until I'm out of high school. Then we'll live in a huge house and I'll have a great job and we'll have so much money that we will make everyone jealous." I laughed at the thought of me being rich, wearing a tux with my hair slicked back. Nagisa's face turned red when she realized I included her in my future plans. There was no need to be so embarrassed about it; I had no trouble saying any of this since it was what I thought.

"Is your face getting red because you are embarrassed or because you are opposed to the idea?" I asked, I had reached the focal point with the swing and my feet touched the sky. I jumped and landed safely on the gravel. I walked back over to the swing again and began pumping back and forth. Nagisa stayed silent for a while.

"It's not that I am opposed to the idea. I just I can't think that far into the future. I know I say about wanting to hurry and grow up, but I have no idea what my plans are when I get there. I know I want to be with you forever but how do I know that my feelings won't change?" She said. I stopped swinging and slowly settled out of motion. I held Nagisa's hand.

"I know my mind won't change." I said. "So even if you start to doubt, I will always be there to steer you on course. I can't picture my life with out you." I said. Nagisa nodded.

"I guess one day we will get married and we will have kids but…." Her face had turned blazing red as she said this. She forced a smile and turned to me. "See I'm already blushing. I just… I would _live _with you Tomoya, if we got married." She said 'live' as the thought made her puke. "I mean I know we live together right now but I would have to use… use the restroom where you could hear… and pass gas where you would hear…" She shuddered. I broke into uncontrollable laughter. She was worried about farting in front of me? As I laughed, she looked to me. Her face was even redder.

"What are you laughing about? You think about being together but you don't think about things like that?" She demanded. I shook my head and wiped the tears from my eyes.

"No, I am a boy, I don't think about things like that. But I do think about sharing a warm house with you where you are cooking dinner. I imagine waking up in the morning and brushing my teeth in the same bathroom that you use. I imagine sleeping on a futon beside you and kissing you and holding you throughout the night." I felt weird saying this, we never talked about any type of… touching. Our kisses were rare and spread apart.

"T-Tomoya!" Nagisa said. She always said my name the same when she was embarrassed. She stumbled over the first syllable and quietly said the rest.

"I already said. I'm a boy, I think about these kind of things." I scratched the back of my neck. Nagisa shook her head.

"It's already lunch time maybe we should go home. I know you don't have your wallet." She said. She got up from swing and started to walk back in the direction I took her arm and pulled her back and down into my lap. The swing swayed beneath our conjoined weight.

"I don't want to go back yet. I have some money we can go eat." I said. I saw a few kids coming into the park and quickly released Nagisa. She stood up and wiped her dress free off wrinkles. I regretted saying we should get something to eat, the best I could do was a fast food restaurant. We walked towards the burger joint in silence. The sidewalk was crowded. I shyly interlaced my fingers away. She looked to see if anyone else was looking and then squeezed my hand.

"I want to be able to hold hands with you one day and not care what other people are thinking." She said as I opened the door. I squeezed her hand back, three times. I had learned this from my father. 3 squeezes was the equivalent of saying 'I love you'. Nagisa questioned this and I told her my reasoning. She smiled and responded with squeezing my hand back three times.

The smell of grease and Windex filled my nose as we walked in side. I ordered two burgers and surrendered the last of my money, receiving only pennies back. I took our food to the table Nagisa had picked out. I unwrapped my burger.

"This is the first time I've seen you eating at a fast food restaurant. I thought you were too classy for something like this." I said. I took a bite of my burger. I tasted good. A sip of coke washed down the bittersweet aftertaste.

"I quite like fast food. I don't have it much though. I rarely go out for dinner." She said. I realized this when I moved to the Furukawa's; they never went out to eat. I hadn't been to a sit down restaurant since before my dad had started drinking.

"We'll go out and have a nice dinner one day. I'll treat you." I said to her. She nodded. Our conversation had already been worn out and now all that was left was awkward silence. "Are you excited about the play?" I asked, trying to make conversation.

"Yes! I've always wanted to do this play! I'm sorry that you have to be the prince though. I know you don't like to act." She said. Ah, she knew me so well.

"Yeah but now we can kiss in front of the whole student body." I joked. Nagisa choked on her drink. I had to pat her on the back a few time before her fit had passed.

"I wasn't thinking that when I picked out the play! It' s acting. It's acting, is all." Nagisa said. She hid her face with her hands.

"Why do get so embarrassed when anything like that comes up?" I asked her. She did though. Anytime we talked about anything personal she automatically blushed.

"Huh?" She said, the paleness returning to her cheeks. "I don't always get embarrassed!" She protested.

"SEX!" I yelled loudly and several people turned around to stare at me. I looked at Nagisa and her face was scarlet.

"Tomoya!" She said.

"See?" I asked her and took a sip of my drink.

"That- that doesn't count! That's disgusting!" She said. I chuckled. My girlfriend thought sex was disgusting. Man, I was so whipped. "I don't know why you aren't embarrassed. You always act like these things don't bother you. It makes me more nervous."

"I get embarrassed. I just don't show it. I have to look cool in front of you. They do call me the ladies man." I joked. Nagisa laughed a little too hard. We finished out burgers and walked around downtown, pointing at paraphernalia that interested us. We went into the costume shop and looked around, knowing that neither of us was going to dress up for Halloween. Time quickly passed and the sun began to set. Without words, we silently headed back to the house. We stopped at the front door, neither of us daring to go in.

"I guess I can't kiss you at the door." I joked. She shook her head.

"Do it. Hurry up, though. I don't want Dad seeing." She said to my total amazement. I bent down awkwardly. I moved my face slowly closer to hers. Our mouths met and I was surprised how Nagisa was moving this time. She actually seemed to be enjoying it. But the question was should I try and go a little further? I started to inch my tongue closer to hers. That second she jumped apart as if a lighting bolt had been thrown between us. I heard voices coming closer to the front door and realized that she might have enjoyed the kiss. Maybe just that she was scared was the reason she broke away. I smiled to myself. I opened the door coming face to face with Akio,

"I was just going to look for you." He said. Darkness consumed the sky now. He stared at me strangely and then at his daughter who stood behind me. "Dinner's ready." He turned and walked back into the house. We followed him. Hisako, Sanae and Kimi were already seated. We walked in and sat down at our usual spots. Nagisa cheeks were red as she stared at the table, not venturing to look up. Sanae and Hisako laughed quietly.

"Looks like your date went well." Hisako said. I nodded, why were they laughing? Nagisa looked up, and over to me. I was about to start digging in when I noticed her giving me a signal. I looked over to her. She mimed something unrecognizable to me when everyone wasn't looking. I ate the food wondering what she could be talking about. I excused myself immediately after supper and relieved myself. As I was washing my hands, I looked up to the mirror. It all made sense now. I had lipstick smeared all over my mouth. I blushed and quickly tried to rub it off. They had all saw, they all SAW! You could obviously see we kissed. I grimaced. No wonder Akio had given me that death stare. I sat in the bathroom for a few more minutes in plain embarrassment. Only when my mortified self walked into my room, did I realize that I was the only one not served cake.


	6. Chapter 6

The next week was a flurry of rehearsals. I think the only thing Nagisa said that week was "we only have four weeks," which gradually faded into "we only have 3 weeks," to "we only have 2 weeks." Mei came on that Wednesday, two weeks before the curtain rose. We met her at the train station holding up a sign that said 'welcome' in big colorful letters. We apologized for not being able to accommodate her but all she did was smile that one hundred watt smile.

"I have been meaning to spend some time with Onii-chan. I'll just sleep over there." She said as her backpack rolled along the sidewalk. Her hair was out of their usual pigtails, and I felt like she was growing up. She would make some man really happy. In the dark, we parted our different ways and rushed back home. Nagisa and I had not even started on our costumes and Sanae graciously said she would help. The sewing machine was already running by the time we got to the house.

"We already have the costumes, it's just small renovations. You don't need to do anything. If anything you'd just be a bother, go and hang out." She said and I felt so grateful. I looked at Nagisa. We hadn't talked about our date at all. If anything, we had been too obsessed about the play to worry about anything else. We walked up the steps and then sat down at the table in my room.

"I'm sorry I've been kind of a dictator lately." Nagisa apologized. I felt bad since that same day I was teasing her about how strict she was being.

"I'm sorry for making fun of you." I mumbled. I sighed. "I am so tired!" I crawled on my hands and knees over to her side of the table and put my head down on her lap. "Ah that's better." I said.

"What- what are you doing, Tomoya?" Nagisa asked, embarrassed.

"Trying to get some sleep." I said turning over, still on her lap. I now faced upward to her face. She sat awkwardly for a few minutes but eventually gave in and started smoothing the hair back from my face.

"You need a haircut. I'll give you one if you want." She said. I closed my eyes feeling her hands on my head.

"Not right now. Maybe tomorrow." I mumbled. I reached my hand up and touched her face affectionately. She did they same for me.

"I… I would really like it if we would kiss right now, maybe. I mean if you want to." She said trying to push away her doubts. I could see the embarrassment playing in her eyes. I pulled her face down to mine and kissed her, after a few seconds she pulled away. "This hurts my back." She said and I realized she was bent over deeply to reach my head. I got off of her lap. We were now sitting facing each other. I blushed.

"Do we just kiss sitting down?" I asked. Wouldn't that be an awkward position?

"I don't know," Nagisa said. She scratched her neck. I crawled over to her again and pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. I pulled her head towards mine. We were seconds away from kissing. Her breath was on my face. Mine was on hers. And then we touched. My eyes closed instantly. She wrapped her arms around my neck. I was surprised; she had never done that before. My eyes popped open and she pulled away again.

"Is that not good?" She asked. Her face was flushed.

"No, no. I liked it." We started again. It felt so crazy. I had the feeling Akio was staring at me over the shoulder, but instead of feeling sneaky and passionate, I just felt bad. I was the one who pulled away this time. Her eyes had formed a question mark. "Sorry, it's just that your parents could walk in at anytime. I feel wrong when we do things like this in their house. But you are so beautiful and so good… I just feel like I could get ahead of myself sometimes and I don't your dad walking in during the middle of it." She nodded. We stayed quiet for a while. "What do we do now?" I laughed and grabbed her hand. "Tell me about your day." I said and regained my position on her lap.

When I woke up it was still dark outside. I don't remember when I fell asleep. I think it was when she had mentioned something about answering a question in class wrong. I pulled my head off of my pillow, it was only when I looked down again did I realize it wasn't a pillow at all but Nagisa's legs. I gasped when I realized that she had fallen asleep too. We had slept in the same room. Panic struck me. I glanced at the clock, it was 6 o' clock, the time we woke up for school. I thanked my internal alarm clock and started calling Nagisa's name.

"Nagisa." I whispered. I said it again but this time with more force. I only then realized that I would have to shake her awake. I hated waking people up, they were so serene one minute and the next they had jumped from their dreamland, and I felt like a villain when I did this. I put my hands on her shoulders, and gently started shaking them. Nagisa's eyes suddenly opened and confusion filled her face when she realized she was in my room.

"Crap," Nagisa exclaimed. This was the closest I'd ever heard to a bad word from her and suddenly felt thankful for this awkward situation.

"Hey it's time to wake up so…." I said and stood up. I got down my school uniform from the hanger in my closet. She realized that there was no apologies or explanations needed and headed out of my room. I started unzipping my hoodie and pulling it off of my head when I heard the door open again. I tried to pull my shirt down quickly but my arms were caught in an unfavorable position. With the shirt stuck in front of my face I couldn't see who it was. I thought maybe I had heard Nagisa's door open instead and began working my arms out of the holes and pulling the sweater over my head. To my surprise Nagisa was standing in my doorway. Her blush was obvious and I felt myself flame too as I was bare-chested and had just made a total fool of myself.

"Sorry, it's just… If Hisako went to bed last night wouldn't she have known I was missing?" Nagisa said. I nodded my head trying to make sense of Nagisa's words. If Hisako knew she was missing, she might have known Nagisa was in my room. If Hisako knew that Nagisa was in my room she would think we were having sex (which didn't though, sadly). So all of this points back to… nothing. My mind drew a blank. I paused for Nagisa to go on.

"I'm embarrassed! She's going to think we did n-n-naughty things! She probably told Mom and Dad!" She whispered with force. I shook my head.

"Then just tell her we feel asleep." I said obviously. Nagisa blinked as if she hadn't though of this. She nodded her head slowly.

"I guess I could do that…" She walked back into her room closing the door behind her. I wondered if she was feeling all right. School was the same; boring with the teacher talking about things I wouldn't ever need to know. Rehearsal finished quickly with just a quick run through. We walked home in silence.

"Hey are you sick or something?" I asked her, I moved in front of her and walked backward. She shook her head.

"I've just been preoccupied I guess. It's nothing though." She smiled and shook her head. She broke out into a grin.

"Tomoya, did you invite your father to the play?" She asked. My eyes opened wide. She knew I didn't like talking about such things; she was trying to play it off as something normal in our usual conversation. I returned to her side when we reached a stoplight.

"No, he doesn't need to come." I said shaking my head. She frowned again.

"I know you don't like me talking about your father, Tomoya. But you can't ignore him forever. I think it's rude that we've already announced we were dating to my parents while your father is still in the dark." She whispered. I was boiling with rage at the remembrance of the way he had treated me. I closed my eyes for a few seconds and pinched the bridge of my nose in frustration. I let out a big gush of air and felt a little better.

"Yes he's in the dark. He's in the dark because he didn't pay the electricity bill again. He's curled up in a corner with a bottle of whiskey in his hand and that stupid, that _stupid_, grin on his face." I said, hostility filling my voice I knew I shouldn't be getting mad at Nagisa. I always did this; I always pushed my frustration on her. "Look, I'm sorry. I'm sorry if I get a little cranky about this but I don't want to talk about." We began walking again in silence. We reached her house, and I walked up the stairs, my feet clomping up the stairs. I had forgot to take off my shoes.

"Tomoya." Nagisa called after me. I could see my room and rushed in. I didn't want to talk to anyone then. I especially don't want Nagisa to see me like this. I heard Nagisa's door the next room over open and close. I heard movement. And then I heard crying. I jolted up from where I was sitting, surely she wasn't crying over what I had said. I burst out of my room and stumbled into hers, tripping on my feet. Nagisa was curled up in a futon. I stared at her tear-streaked face. I knew she was sick, I knew it. I rushed over to her.

"Listen, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. Are you sick? Is it serious?" I asked, kneeling down beside her. Her fever was clear when her face turned completely red.

"No- No Tomoya. I'm not sick… I just have cramps." She said. My face turned red. She was… PMS-ing?

"What?" I said. Maybe I hadn't heard her correctly.

"I'm on my…" I slapped a hand over her mouth.

"I heard you!" I exclaimed. My face was entirely red now. Nagisa looked away from me.

"I didn't want to tell you." She said talking to the wall. I nodded and scratched my cheek.

"I'm embarrassed." She said and laughed.

"This happens a lot? I mean the cramps, not the other thing…" I trailed. What else could I do?

"No, it's because of the stress. I'm going to a take a nap now, so you can leave." She said waving at the door. I got up.

"Uh yeah. I uh I'm sorry again. Good luck with that," I cursed myself for my stupidity and closed the door behind me. When I got to my room, my face had cooled down but barely. I can't believe that- I mean I guess I never thought about that kind of thing. I wouldn't be able to look at Nagisa the same ever again. I walked down to the dinner table. Everyone was already chatting at the table. Nagisa was out of her pajamas and changed into some normal clothes. I walked stiffly towards the crowded table. Sanae saw my hesitation and laughed behind a hand. As much as I loved Sanae sometimes I wanted to kill her. I sat down in my usual spot next to Nagisa, my food already sat in front of me. I reached for the soy sauce and brushed over Nagisa's hand. I quickly recoiled and then regretted.

"Sorry." I whispered and blushed. She nodded. I was surprised when Hisako mentioned nothing of the fact that Nagisa didn't go back to her room last night. Dinner finished quickly and I went to bed, worn out from a long day. I woke up on time but barely. I hadn't gotten an iota of sleep. All I could do was sit with my eyes close and run through the lines in my play. I was getting nervous. We only had a week and a half left and everyone would be depending on me. I had never been on a stage so I couldn't say if I would get stage fright or not. We walked to school; everything was finally back to normal. Why did time pass by so fast?


	7. Chapter 7

The day before Halloween when we arrived home, a very enthusiastic Hisako greeted us.

"How was your day at school?" Hisako asked but didn't give us anytime to respond. "I found a job. A real one! It's over at the toyshop Akio always goes to. He put in a good word for me and I got hired on the spot. I'm so excited!" She jumped and scared Nagisa and I. We laughed at her display of jubilancy. We were happy too. We had a great final rehearsal. We were expected at the school the next day at 10 and I couldn't wait to sleep in and then get this whole thing over with. We went on a walk with Hisako, after she had begged us to, to buy some supplies for supper. Apparently she was buying. I liked this Hisako. Her personality had changed somewhat. She was more relaxed around Nagisa and I. She kept secrets but still gave you a beating down if she thought you were getting a big head. She was a great mom. Kimi tottered along uneasily next to us. I picked her up and let her ride piggyback on my shoulder. Man, did I spoil her! Over the past few weeks when she came to me she knew she would get a treat. Nagisa giggled and slowed down to my pace and we walked by store windows. We pointed out things we'd like to buy and things we wished we had. I looked towards the sky and noticed the clouds forming. I hoped that rain wouldn't come down and ruin children's hopes of trick or treating. Hisako eventually noticed that we weren't following and slowed down to listen to our conversation. She didn't add anything, just listened. We somehow got back on track and reached our destination, the local grocery store. We browsed the produce and then on to meats picking a nice pork roast. I felt like a little dysfunctional family. We were getting the eggs when suddenly Hisako gasped. She dropped the eggs into the basket and all I can remember thinking is how strange it was that they didn't break. Hisako was staring at someone the next aisle over. I looked in the direction she was pointed and saw my dad.

"You know him?" I asked feeling an unnecessary edge to my voice. She nodded and ran over to him before I could stop her.

"Where the hell have you been?" Hisako screamed. I realized that instead of an old high school friendship there was obviously something wrong. I stayed back with Nagisa and Kimi, while I saw Hisako split her hand across my dad's face. I stared in shock and couldn't tear my eyes away. Nagisa clutched my arm.

"Why is she doing that?" She asked in concern. I shook my head and started to edge towards them but Nagisa held me back.

"Where the hell have you been?" Hisako asked again. My dads face folded from a smile to a frown.

"I've been here." He said. Hisako shook her head.

"Where have you been for the past year? Why don't you pick up your calls?" She asked a thought struck me. Did our Hisako have a relationship with that scumbag?

"The phone got disconnected." He answered simply. "How've you been?" She slapped him again. Why weren't the grocery personnel breaking the fight up?

"Don't you dare ask me that!" She screamed. "Do you know what I've had to go through?"

"I gave you some money." My dad said. A sick feeling was settling over my stomach. Please, no, Oh God no.

"You can't just give me a few hundred bucks and expect my to handle everything alone! What about your daughter?" She yelled throwing her hands up. My eyes darted to Kimi who was holding onto Nagisa's finger. I don't remember exactly what happened next. The next thing I know, I had begun running. I ran past the vegetables where we had happily been chatting just minutes ago. I ran through the sliding glass doors and ran through the parking lot. I realized there was nowhere to go. I was near the park Nagisa and I had gone to just a few weeks earlier. I sighed as I headed over to the swings. I sat down with force. I dropped my head in my hands. What just happened? Did Hisako just say what I thought she said?

"UUGHH!" I screamed kicking the gravel. They flew off into every direction. Some hit the pavement across from me while other scattered every which way. Some minutes passed and when I looked up again and Nagisa was there. She walked over to me. I couldn't look her in the eye. I stared at the slide as the clouds gathered together. Nagisa hesitated near me. I could feel her body heat as she came closer. He always ruined everything. He was always there, no matter how big the world was. He made the world smaller. I felt tears come in my eyes, and blinked a few times hoping they would recede. They didn't but they didn't want move either. They stayed on the tip of my eyes, blurring any and everything. Nagisa suddenly wrapped her arms around, my head laid against her chest. She kissed my head.

"Why?" I yelled to her. "Why do you do this? Why do you put up with me? After all of this?" She said nothing but pulled me closer. "Why does her do this to me? I hate him! He abandoned Hisako and even someone as cute as Kimi. I wish that he wasn't my dad?" Nagisa shook her head slowly.

"If he wasn't your dad then you wouldn't be you. I love you, Tomoya. It doesn't matter who your parents are and what they've done. What happened to Hisako isn't anyone's fault. But if it weren't for their mistake we wouldn't have Kimi. We wouldn't have had all the experiences we had." She said. We stayed in our positions silently for a few minutes when finally Nagisa moved to the swing next to me.

"I know you. I walked with you once upon a dream." Nagisa started singing quietly. She had been singing this on and off for the past week, taking the lyrics from the Disney version. I joined in this time surprising myself.

"You'll love me at once, the way you did once upon a dream." I finished and grabbed her hand. Hisako found us about an hour later, Kimi on her hip. Her eyes were red and blotchy.

"I didn't know he was your dad. You don't look alike! I didn't know your last name." She said trying to defend herself. Nagisa's hands were still in mine and I slowly rocked the swing back and forth. I didn't respond and Hisako stayed on the other side. "We had been together for a long time but we both knew nothing was going to happen and then I found I was going to have Kimi and we both freaked out and I didn't want a baby. I was going to… get an abortion. But I changed my mind and well, we hadn't seen each other since." I didn't want to here this. I didn't want to talk about this. I knew I shouldn't be mad at Hisako but I felt the resentment rising in my chest. "At least now you have a… sister." She choked on the last word and it spilled out in a bawling. She covered her face and continued crying. I stood up from the swing and walked over to her. Why?

We walked home in silence. I couldn't even look at Kimi. She wobbled over to me and tried to take my hand but I sped up and let Nagisa take her instead. The second she saw me speeding away, Kimi burst into a fit a tears. She plopped down in the middle of the sidewalk and threw a tantrum. I walked back over to the baby and suddenly felt awkward. I felt like a stranger to her now. I took her hand in mine and eventually she settled down. We continued walking hand and hand. We reached the house in record time. I felt a few droplets fall on my head and when I looked up the clouds I saw earlier had closed into a big thick cloud stretching over the sky. I needed to get away. I didn't need Nagisa to save me right now. I walked away while they called after me. I walked through the rain, which quickly became a pour and when I looked up again I was in front of my father's house. I was soaking wet, my clothes sticking to my skin. I opened the door as if I was coming home from school instead of staying away for more than a year. I walked in. I smelled trash. I looked around and found my father having dinner.

"Ah, Tomoya," He said and looked up, Why did he act not surprised to se me? I charged over to him and hit him. I felt bad immediately afterward. I had hit my father, a drunkard who didn't know what he was supposed to be doing. The anger I had holding for the past year and a half melted away. I apologized immediately afterward. All he did was nod. I sat down across the table "Is that your girlfriend's house you're staying at?" He asked as if nothing had happened. I nodded. "What a small world." He said continuing with his food.

"Why don't you… just stop drinking?" I asked suddenly. I realized I should have asked this question long ago. He smiled.

"I can't. When your mom died I swore I was going to be a good father. Look at me now. There is just a point when you give up." He said and chuckled. Why did nothing bother him?

"You have another chance. You do." I said and my voice became louder. "It is a sign. Hisako had Kimi so you could have a redo. All I'm saying is that living with only one parent was hell for me. I don't want her to have to go through that too." I stood then and left not waiting for a response. He called after me and I stood in the doorway to his house and stopped.

"Maybe it is. But I'll probably screw it up again." He whispered. I slammed the door and went back outside. The sun had faded down, behind the clouds, the downpour slowing settling to a foggy mist. When I returned to the Furukawa's I saw no one. I sighed and walked into the kitchen got an apple, ate it and went to bed.

The next day I woke up late wondering if I had school. And then the thought hit me. Today was Halloween. I looked at the clock.

"Crap!" I yelled. We only had 30 minutes until we were suppose to be there. I hurriedly threw clothes on. I rushed into Nagisa's room to find her sitting on her bed rehearsing her lines. Her eyes were splotchy as I'm sure mine were.

"I 'm so nervous I don't know what to do." Nagisa said her voice shaking. I walked over to her and kissed her head.

"C'mon we are going to be late." I said and we rushed out of the house. I was thankful that I woke up late. I didn't have to face anyone. I wondered if Hisako had told Nagisa's parents and hoped against it. Whenever they looked at me they would only think of my moronic father. Pandemonium raced through the halls when we arrived at the school. We had ignored each other for the entire walk, Nagisa and I. I didn't know what to say. I didn't hate me life. I just hated the situations I was forced into, again and again.

"Hey!" Kyou yelled when she saw us. She was dressed in her fairy suit, her wings springing out of her back. I was glad she was still oblivious. "C'mon! The play is starting in 20 minutes!" I rushed into the dressing room and when I got out, neatly dressed in my attire, I saw Sunohara already in all black. Mei stood next her brother and smiled.

"I'm so excited!" She yelled. And it finally hit me. I would be on stage in front of the student body. My heartbeat began beating rapidly. I rushed over to Nagisa, who was cowered in a dark corner of the stage, knowing she would be feeling worse. Her face was white. I put my hands on her shoulder.

"Listen, we are going to do great. Really. All of this crap with my dad, it's gone right now. We are going to do great." She looked up at me slowly. "I know you are depending on everyone right now. It's about this play right now. We both know this is probably our last time on this stage so let's make it the best ever. Better than anything anyone else had put on in the dump." I said. I felt like a dad lecturing his daughter. Nagisa nodded. She breathed in and out slowly.

"I invited your dad." She whispered. I froze.

"What?" I breathed. My voice got stuck making my voice sound like a bulldog's growl.

"When you left. I invited him. I'm sorry. I know I did something bad. You can hit me." She said. I shook my head in surprise. Why did she assume I would hit her?

"I would never hit you. But I am mad." I breathed out. "Why would you do that? No, don't answer. I guess if he is here since you invited him, he can watch the play. But I'm not talking to him." I said. I knew myself, but why wasn't I blowing up in rage? Something must be wrong with me. I hated everyone one right now, except Nagisa, so why should I get her dragged into it? Nagisa wrapped her arms around my chest. I patted her head. Mei found us like this and automatically blushed. She was so innocent.

"Um, We are on in 5 minutes." She said and shyly walked away. Nagisa still had her arms around me. I pulled away and headed back to the stage. We walked onto the stage and the curtain rose before us.


	8. Chapter 8

The curtain closed. I got hear polite claps rumbling in the distance. I collapsed on the floor while Kyou, Ryou, Kotomi, and Nagisa cheered at the success of the play. It went without a hitch and I was grateful for all the rehearsals. Nagisa had some trouble and the beginning as she had the first play we put on but quickly got over it. I could see Nagisa's parents in the audience with Hisako next to them, bouncing Kimi on her lap. I didn't see my dad. We got out of our costumes and made our way to the front where we had promised to meet the parents. We all knew we were too tired to explore the parade at all. Nagisa and I rushed over to our guardians. They were all complimenting us but Hisako couldn't look me in the eye.

"Congratulations, guys. It was great." She said talking to Nagisa. I looked away from her. Seeing her struggling made me feel bad. We walked home. All Akio could do was gush about his daughter.

"Though the end, I don't know. A kiss? Why couldn't a firm handshake wake her up?" He asked being serious. I chuckled as we exited the school grounds. We walked up the path that Nagisa and I so normally took. I saw my father standing a few feet in front of us. All he did was nod and walk away. That was the last time I saw my father.

We arrived home and Sanae prepared a big lunch. Nagisa and I both commented on how the lights on stage were slow moving and barely followed us and could picture Mei criticizing her brother and that very moment. Lunch was served, the pork roast we had bought the night before was served. I devoured the food. I had only an apple from the night before, and had rushed out before I could even think about breakfast.

"Want to slow down. Tomoya?" Nagisa giggled and patted my back. She quickly withdrew her hand when she realized her parents were watching. Akio spoke up.

"I don't like how you guys touch all the time. Stop it. Didn't I say no talking without parent supervision?" Akio said. I could see the death rays emitting from his eyes.

"Uh no, aren't you the parental supervision? Wouldn't you be watching us right now?" I said sarcastically.

"Kah, don't give me that attitude. And besides I'm saying it now." Akio said. I wondered how that rule would be enforced.

"You haven't had sex have you?" Akio said. I felt the fork drop from my fingers and Nagisa choked on her drink.

"No! Why does everyone keep asking that?" I yelled. Akio's stare got deeper.

"Everyone? Who's everyone? Why are you even thinking about it?" He asked but before I could respond he gasped and looked to his daughter. "You know what that IS?" He asked staring at his daughter in horror.

"Dad!" Nagisa yelled in embarrassment. Our faces were the same color this time, a solid maroon. A smiled played on Hisako's face, she broke into a fit of laughter. She even slapped her knee, twice. We stared at her until finally I join in. The rest of the group followed suit not knowing what we were laughing at.

"You guys are hilarious! I feel like I'm watching a rerun of Full House," She said. She sighed. "I guess I should say this now while everything is still nice. I have some money saved up, from what mom gave us." She said motioning to Sanae. "I found a little place, enough room for Kimi and I. It's next to a free daycare center. It costs a little more than I have but now that I have a steady income… The thing is I'm moving out. I wanted to thank you for all you've put up with me for. Especially Nagisa, for sharing a room with me. Especially Sanae, because you let me stay in your house. Especially Akio for forgiving me, Especially Tomoya, because you saved me." She stayed silent for a while. "I just wish I could stay longer." She said and then shook her head. "I'm lying. I am interrupting your rhythm, your pattern. Forgive me for that, but not for anything else. I'll leave by the end of the month." Her voice wiggled as if she would start crying, she regained her composure quickly though. I wasn't surprised at this announcement, I could feel her anxiety since the moment I met her after the play. I couldn't say I was disappointed, I only felt remorse when I thought of Hisako. Baby Kimi walked over to me, her arms spread as an eagle. I put her on my lap and continued eating my food as if nothing had happened. I felt bad for Kimi, although I thought we would see each other regularly, as she would never feel this connection to me again. Her innocence seemed to so angelic now but I couldn't picture this with out thinking about how she would grow up one day and not remember who I was. The thoughts were blurred with her child like face and now I could clearly see the resemblance to my father. Our nose was the same, and our eyes a chilling blue. I really wondered where her hair came from. Lunch finished quickly and we went our separate ways. I went straight to my room. How come everything was falling into place? Someone knocked on my door and Nagisa came in. I wanted her to go away and was about to tell her when she stopped me.

"I know you want to be alone and I know you think you can handle everything on your own, but you can't. Tell me what is on your mind and right now I will not be Nagisa, I will be someone completely different. Just think of me as your personal diary." She said and sat across from me. I was reluctant at first; I couldn't picture Nagisa as anything but Nagisa.

"Well," I started, scratching my cheek. "I don't want to be here right now. I don't want to be my father, you know?" I asked for confirmation. Nagisa nodded her head encouragingly. "I am thankful to him but I hate him all the same. I don't want to end up like him. Maybe it runs in the family, it's in our genes? I love you and all Nagisa, but I'm sure my dad loved Hisako too. I mean if we were in the same situation… I wouldn't know what I would do. I can't even picture it." She nodded again, more slowly. "I'm a teenager and I thinking that is the same thoughts my dad had, drugs have destroyed him. I want to think about you forever but the divorce rate is so high, but I can't even picture us fighting. I feel like I mean something to someone when you call out to me. I love you, I am sure of that though. I wonder what is going to happen in the future. I don't want to be suffocated in the house forever. Your dad is always focused on us, even though it might not seem that way. I want to get away one day and have my own house, with you. I want to be able to support you no matter what comes along." I was rambling now, going in and out of what I was trying to say. I wasn't even looking at Nagisa, instead at the table, a shining mahogany. "I mean Kimi is cute and all and I wouldn't mind having kids when I'm older but when I'm ready. I don't even know what I'm saying. I guess, I can relate to my father? No, that's not it. I feel sorry for that pathetic man." I was done with my rant then, swearing I would tell no more. Nagisa just nodded.

"That was fun. We should do that more often. Next time you'll be the listener. Do you feel better now?" Nagisa asked standing up. I nodded and stood up too.

"You are not even going to say anything to me about what I said?" I asked in surprise. She shook her head.

"We all need to do that every once in a while." She left with out another word. I didn't know what to make of this. I walked downstairs to find only Hisako, and Kimi of course, sitting at the kitchen table. I tried to duck away to avoid making an awkward conversation.

"Tomoya?" She called before I could escape. I walked over and sat down. "I know this is weird and this is awkward but ignoring me isn't going to do anything." She said and I was thankful she was back to normal. "I remember when I was your age, I thought my life would just unfold before me and I wouldn't have to do anything special. I just, I wish I had planed better. I know you are thinking I'm saying this because I have a baby on my hip but I don't have a specific career choice, no chance of marriage in the future, I'm broke. I stole the car." She added, throwing the last part in fast. She was mentioning the car I had first seen her in. I hadn't seen it since the first night she came. Where had she parked it? "It was my dad's. I lived with him when I had Kimi and one day I just packed up and left in his car. The cops found me, but dad decided not to press charges. I am so thankful to my parents, they put up with me despite all of my crap. I think of you and your dad like my parents and I except the roles are reversed. You take all the crap he gives you and I know you just needed to get away. I am so proud that you could do what my parents could not. Sanae was always compared to me. 'Why aren't you more sociable like your sister?' they would say to her. Now look at us." She motioned to herself and the house surrounding us. " I will stay in touch even after I leave, you can bet on that. You and Kimi better be the best siblings ever or I will hang myself." She said and I was afraid she meant it. "I'm going over to your dad's house later. I'm going to apologize and even if I don't want him to be a part of my life. I want him to a least see Kimi sometimes." I wanted someone like Hisako around when I was growing up and I felt a strange longing for the mom I never had. I wanted to do something, but most of all I wanted my mom. I felt tears roll in my eyes but quickly forced them down. Hisako got up and put her dishes into the sink. I got up too and got a quick snack, anxious for dinner. I headed back to my room.

Dinner was gratefully back to normal. Akio made his usual corny jokes while Sanae laughed politely. Hisako even added her own sarcasm to the conversation. We had just started on desert; warm brownies drizzled with caramel, when the doorbell rang. Akio answered it while we kept chatting on. When he came back, a police officer was on his heels. My eyes suddenly glanced to Hisako as I was reminded of her story that same afternoon. The policeman just shook his head.

"I am sorry to put a damper on your happiness but I am afraid we have some bad news. Today at approximately 12:30 we found a man at he bottom of a bridge. He jumped, a suicide, and it immediately crushed his neck. This man was Okazaki Naoyuki." I looked up at the mention of my father's name. What?

"I'm sorry?" I said to the officer making sure I heard him right. I had to talk over the distant wails of Hisako. The officer just shook his head.

"You are his son right? I am sorry but your father is dead." He said. Akio's face was cold as he led the officer out. I stared at my plate. I numbly felt Nagisa's hand slip into mine, when I looked at her, tears poured down her face. I looked over at Hisako who was in hysterics. She wailed and clutched onto her sister. Sanae also had tears in her eyes. She didn't even know him. Why was she crying? All at once, my senses began working again. My father who had raised was dead, I would never see him again. My face crumpled in a split second. Tears poured down my face as I wailed, probably louder than Hisako. I pulled at my hair. I felt Nagisa wrap me in her arms. What happened to a second chance? He killed himself, my father killed himself. I was spread on the floor by then, my face in my hands, curled up into a tight ball. Nagisa could not stop touching me, she was on my face, on my arms.

"I hate him!" I yelled at her, she was taken aback and scooted away not knowing what to do. Akio walked over to me and grabbed me by the shirt collar. He dragged me out of the house to the backyard.

"If you cry in front of her again. I will kill you. No matter how hard it is, you will go somewhere else and then you will cry." Was all he said. I sat on the porch, my sobs turning into sniffles then in reverse. Akio smoked a cigarette and paid no attention to me. He was gone, my father was gone. Someone whom I hated for so long had finally disappeared and now there was nothing. The blame was mine and mine alone. Akio finally roamed around, walking in circles. I looked up, snot ran down my nose.

"I don't know what to do. Why am I acting like this?" I asked him. Akio sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Because you love him, as much as you try to forget." He said simply going back into the house. I shook my head and walked back followed suit, walking into the house, regaining my composure long enough to reach my room. I didn't see Hisako or Sana and wondered where they had gone. I opened my bedroom door and to my surprise Nagsia was already waiting inside.

"I'm sorry." I mumbled about earlier. "Could you just leave right now?" I asked and felt the sobs begin to rise again. She nodded but before she left gave me a big hug.

"No matter what it is, I am here for you." She said her own voice breaking into loud racking sobs.

"I just need to be alone" I said. She left without questions.

That night I cried myself to sleep.


	9. Chapter 9

The weeks were filled with regret. I would hear someone come up and say his or her apologies, apologies for my father and me. After hearing my silence and seeing my distant glance they would immediately leave. I called to them in my mind saying thanks for caring but not having enough energy to make the effort. Nagisa was silent about my attitude for the first few weeks. She wasn't her own usual self and I knew I had a hand in that. The days passed quickly and it was soon Christmas break. We parted from our friends for the holidays. No one knew how to react to me, or what to talk about. I was mostly silent anyway. I felt like all the progress I had made since I met Nagisa had dispersed in seconds. We walked home, Nagisa trailed after me warily. She always stood by me like I would break at any second, she was always cautious now. We reached an empty house, our empty house. Hisako had moved already. The beginning of winter was met with the end of their stay. The times Akio and Sanae stayed at the park became longer and longer. Nagisa and I parted as we usually did and headed to our rooms.

"Tomoya, would you like a snack?" She said making conversation and I shook my head. She just nodded. _No wait, I'm sorry. Come back and we will have a nice talk and I'll kiss your forehead and everything will be back to normal._ My mind was always quick reacting, thinking of a better response than what I had already said. Nagisa entered her room and closed the door behind her. I felt bad too, but I wouldn't do anything about it. I needed to get over this hurdle by myself.

I felt I had contributed to my father's suicide. I spent nights filled with guilt; writing in a journal whatever came to mind. Usually I filled the pages with drawings and scribbles. I knew if I didn't do this, I would surely drown. Only then, by myself, did I realize that I wasn't upset about my father's death but more of the fact that I was so oblivious to his thoughts The Furukawa family proceeded as normal. They almost ignored me completely now, knowing I wouldn't react to anything. At the beginning, Nagisa had tried to bring me out of my funk. She soon stopped trying. I put thunked myself in my forehead, when the thought of Nagisa came up again. I can remember what I said clearly.

_"Tomoya. Do your class work." Nagisa gently prodded a few weeks after it had happened. I shook my head and threw the backpack she was edging towards me to the other wall. She didn't stop. "Tomoya. I think you need to get out of it. I think you need to return to normal." I shook my head again._

_"My father died, Nagisa. You don't know anything about death. All you think about is butterflies and rainbows. Get a clue. Life sucks. It's over the day you begin. Just get out of here. I don't want to talk to you."_

It might not seem that threatening to someone else but it was the most inconsiderate things I had said to her. She stopped talking to me seriously since that day, almost a month ago. I heard a knock on my door and quickly told the person to come in. It was Nagisa. She sat down on my floor and I quickly slipped my journal into a desk drawer. We were silent.

I'm sorry I said those things. Can we go back to normal? I wanted to say this but couldn't bring myself to lose my pride.

"I think we should do something for my birthday. The two of us that is." Nagisa said. I was surprised at this remark. She hadn't acknowledged me in a week and now a plan for a date.

"I don't know…" I said and trailed off. I don't know why I did this. I did, so much, want to spend time with Nagisa. She looked at the table in embarrassment. I knew it must have took all of her confidence to ask me that. She got up.

"Wait." I called after her and she stopped at the door. I sighed heavily. "I don't know why I act this way sometimes. I want to go on a date with you." I said and immediately felt wrong. She came back and sat down.

"You don't know what it is like to see you like this, Tomoya. You are pathetic." She said. I jumped with the hatred in her voice. This was one of the only insults I had received from her. "You mope around everywhere. I know you are upset and it is ok to be, but you don't even try to hide it. I just-" Her eyes filled with tears and she tried to wipe them away. "I just want to talk to you normally and I want to hold your hand." Tears streamed down her face. "And I want to sit in your room with you. I want to spend time with you, but you are pushing everyone away and I just don't know what to do when you act like this." I stayed silent after she had finished talked. She body racked with sniffles and she reached for the tissue box on my desk.

"I don't know. I'm not sure what I am suppose to do Nagisa, or even what I am suppose to feel. I just don't know. I want to act normally but I can't just stop thinking about the fact that my father killed himself because of me. Why did this happen to me?" I said. "Even if I did get over it quickly, if I don't show remorse than people will think I am glad he is dead." I added quietly. She nodded her head.

"Even if your aren't sure, or if your are afraid or hurting I will always be here. I will always l-l-love you." She choked on the lasts words, returning to her normal coy self. I was so happy Nagisa was shy and so feminine; she was the only one who could make me feel normal again. I smiled and took her hand in mind. We watched as the sun went down through my window. I wondered if this was a sign. Was it the ending of my misery or the beginning of new times? I hoped for both. I really needed to change my outlook like. I needed to learn a lesson from my past self and stop caring what people thought. I gathered Nagisa in my arms and rocked her back and forth.

"Why am I so lucky?" I said. I felt as if my worries had eased away. I looked back at the sky, now speckled with stars. Even though Nagisa denies this, I swear I saw a little ball of light float up and join the stars, making a black spot in the night disappear and filling it with bright hope.


End file.
